"Aw fuck it, i'm gonna have a party!"

After 23 years of absolute anxiety I have finally realized "what does it matter, we're all just going to die anyway." It's the truest statement i have ever said. Why worry and go fucking crazy? EVERYONE just dies anyway! With this statement present in the front of my mind I almost feel empowered. I am now ready to try and read a book. If i'm going to die eventually anyway, I might as well try and become a more well rounded person while I can.


A List of Previous Failed Attempts to try and Stay Sane:

-Aggressively walking
-Gin Gin Gin Gin Gin
-coloring
-watching crazy childrens shows in the morning (Yo Gabba Gabba, Fraggle Rock, etc)
-shopping
-getting lost in the woods/park

"Amazing still it seems, i'll be 23...."

While washing the hot sauce off my foot in the shower (last night i dropped a huge bottle of hot sauce and it exploded everywhere), I came to a few realizations.....

First off, as I kick 22's ass out the fucking window, and welcome 23 with caution and lack of trust, I seem to become more and more of a hot mess everyday! At first I thought my clumsiness/ bad luck/ stupidity was just a phase, but I was wrong. In fact, it's getting progressively worse as the years go on. So much for that psychic saying my bad luck will end two December's ago....

The next two are things I already knew, but tried so hard to have faith and not believe them, until i found myself speaking like an after school special last night. "...but what sucks is that nothing can be accomplished unless people have faith in themselves," and something else along the lines of "everything's the same no matter where you go." That equals a big fat LAME.
I hate growing up. I don't want to lose all my friends (like my mom told me will happen).

Ok and a question, if I think that all boys are the same, do boys think that all girls are the same?

AND! HOW DO I GET MY CATS TO STOP HIDING UNDER MY BED!??!?!?!

new apt...almost there.....